Glenn: Lola, we have some good news and some bad news.
The good news is, you don't have cancer.
Lola: Ohh! Glenn: Cat just put nair in your shampoo.
Cat: Because you ate my lunch from the refrigerator.
Glenn: And the bad news is, she also put a chemical in your
iced tea which turns your nose into a tennis ball.
But it only lasts a second.
So basically, everything's okay.
Everything's okay.
Owen: Chief!
Can't you see I'm busy?
Chief: Sometimes I wish I was a mirror.
Sync & corrections by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com
Lola: Hey, Dori, my round sheet is empty.
Is that a mistake?
Dori: Doesn't look like it.
Owen: This place is empty. What gives?
Dori: There are no admissions today, and we just discharged the last child.
Cat: Are you saying there are no more patients left in the hospital?
Beth: Guys, what do we do with all our time?
Sy: Listen, I'm going into town to register the new ambulance.
Glenn: Sy! Sy! Sy!
Before you go, there are no patients left to treat.
Any extra tasks you need us doing?
Sy: As a matter of fact, thank you, Glenn.
There's a lot of things to be done.
First off, the organ supply room needs cleaning.
Blake: I'll do it!
[ Laughs ] Psych!
Sy: Wear gloves this time.
Blake: I'll do it my own way.
Sy: And then, most importantly, the patients' records, all right?
Now, look at this -- completely disorganized.
These have been handed down from administrator to administrator.
You know how important this is to me.
Glenn, will you take care of reorganizing this entire room?
Glenn: I will not let you down, sir.
Sy: I would never have asked you, son, if I didn't believe in you.
Chet: Are they falling in love?
Owen: Yes.
Sy: All right, Glenn is in charge, everybody.
And these files better be perfect when I get back.
Lola: I'd rather clean monkey crap.
Sy: You know what, Lola?
That is a great idea.
The animal-testing lab is filthy.
Lola: [ Scoffs ]
Should have said, "I'd rather clean the Dylan McDermott lab."
Sy: Who's gonna come with me?
It's a great adventure.
Dori! Perfect!
Dori: Ohh!
Sy: Let's go!
Blake: Hey, Rosa.
Working hard or hardly working?
Rosa: [ European accent ] Oh, somewhere in between, Mr. Dr. Downs.
Blake: I see what you're saying.
You're not working as hard as you can be, but you're certainly
not working.
Rosa: [ Chuckles ]
Blake: Oof.
This uterus expired on Tuesday.
You know what?
I figure we have a 10-day grace period.
Rosa: Expiration dates are really just suggestions.
Blake: I like the way you think, lady.
Rosa: You know, being around all these organs is making me hungry.
Would you like to come to my home for lunch?
Sal: Attention, staff.
My dick.
That is all.
Lola: Hey, chief.
Chief: Oh.
Owen isn't interested in me.
Do you think he noticed I use a walker?
Lola: Oh, I'd love to girl-gab, but I just injected
all these stem cells into that handicapped monkey.
[ Screeches ]
Chief: He doesn't need glasses or his walker?!
[ Gasps ]
Stem cells cure handicaps!
Mama want!
Lola: No! Chief, no!
Oh, God!
Chief: [ Gasping ]
Wait a minute.
I don't feel anything at all.
Thanks for nothing, whore!
Lola: Wait. Chief.
Think fast!
[ Gasps ]
Amazing!
Chief: Oh, my God.
Lola: Look at that.
Oh, my God.
Chief: I'm cured!
Stem cells? What a great idea!
Glenn: [ Laughs ] Okay.
What do you say, guys?
Let's get busy!
Cat: I'm not doing donkey dick.
Glenn: Look, Cat -- Chet: What part of "donkey
dick" don't you understand, ass-kisser?!
Glenn: All right.
So, how do you want to do this?
My favorite letters are I, T, V, Q, and S, so, obviously, I'll take -- aaaah!
Oh, my God.
For a second there, I thought that was a real airplane.
What's the deal, Cat?
Cat: Glenn, this is a free day!
I mean, do you really want to spend it organizing records, or
do you want to spend setting them?
Am I right, guys?
[ Peppy music plays ]
[ Music stops ]
Okay, let's go!
[ Music resumes ]
[ Both laughing ]
Glenn: Come on, guys!
Are we doctors or are we... Dart doctors?
[ Music continues on radio ]
No! No, no, no!
The ladies' room is right there!
Sy, where are you?
Owen: Ha-cha-cha!
Whew.
Ooh. Hey, there.
You new at this hospital?
Chief: In a way.
Owen: What's your name, beautiful?
Chief: My name?
Uh, I-- it's... it's, uh, uh... [ Sneezes ]
Chief: My name... Ooh, I -- ouch.
It's, uh... hey.
Chief: Uh...it's chief.
Uh, chief...Smith.
Owen: Oh.
Well, we have another lady here named chief, but she's ugly.
Chief: Oh, really?
Owen: Yeah.
She's about as ugly as a big pile of poo.
Chief: Oh.
Owen: Mm-hmm.
She's so ugly, a poo takes a her.
Chief: Hmm.
Owen: If a dog wanted to eat his own poo, he would make a
mistake and eat her.
Chief: Yeah.
Owen: For all intents and purposes, she is poo.
Chief: Ohhh.
Owen: When she goes to the toilet store, they tell her to
"go around back 'cause that's where we let the poo in."
Chief: Oh, God.
Owen: If you do a Google image search of the word "poo,"
pictures of poo show up, but then there's a picture of her.
Mm.
Crazy people smear her on the walls.
Chief: There's more.
Rosa: Hi! Hi.
We're hungry, mama!
We're hungry!
Rosa: They're saying they're hungry.
Blake: Yeah, yeah.
No, I heard them.
They spoke English.
Rosa: Come and sit.
Back in Ukraine, I was hospital administrator.
I loved it so.
Oh, thank you, grandma.
I work at Childrens just to be around the administrating.
Blake: Sort of like a lower-stakes "Good Will Hunting."
Rosa: Exactly.
Blake: Yeah. [ Laughs ]
Mmm. This soup is incredible.
Is there a secret ingredient?
Rosa: Oh, yes. [ Chuckles ]
Love.
[ Folk music plays ]
[ Laughter ]
[ Up-tempo music plays ]
Cat: Glenn, come on.
Let yourself go.
Glenn: Ahh... Cat: Dance.
Glenn: Oh, you know what?
You're right.
The files can wait.
I got to dance!
[ All cheering ]
Lola: Whoa, Glenn!
Chet: Yeah!
Lola: All right!
Cat: What?!
Glenn: Hey!
Pool! Pool!
Aah!
[ All cheering ]
Lola: [ Vomits ]
Glenn: Free day! [ Laughs ]
Blake: Thank you so much, Sasha.
Really nice meeting you, Andrash.
And you, too, Tiffany.
Don't ever change.
And you... [ laughs ]
This day has been wonderful.
Rosa: No!
Blake: But we -- we have a connection.
I'm Robin Williams, you're Matt Damon.
Let's make love, like they did in the movie.
Rosa: No! No!
I don't like you like that!
Please, Dr. Blake, leave!
Blake: Let me kiss her on the mouth!
Rosa! No! No! No!
No!
Mwah! Mwah!
No!
[ Both laughing ]
Owen: I'll tell you what, chief Smith, I'm gonna go get us some mai tais.
Don't you go anywhere.
Chief: Don't you worry.
Both: Rowr!
[ Both laugh ]
Chief: Mmm.
Lola: Hey! Think fast!
[ Gasps ]
Chief: Wait a minute.
Let me put on my -- my glasses.
Owen: Poo chief, where did chief Smith go?!
You got to help me find her!
Chief: Her is me!
Her is me!
♪ For your sins ♪
Glenn: Hey, Blake, where have you been?
Blake: Well, let's just say that I've been to another world
and I fell in love, and it was not mutual, and I was forcibly removed.
Cat: Aw, sweet.
Glenn: Are those patients' files?
Cat: Yeah.
Glenn: Why are you throwing them into the fire?!
Cat: Don't you get it?
I don't know.
[ Cellphone vibrates ]
Glenn: Sy's on his way back.
Lola: If only any of us knew something about administrating,
then we could fix this.
Blake: Wait a minute!
Guys, I have an idea.
Wait right here, okay?
Do you have a sec?
Rosa: No.
Blake: Come on.
Everybody, this is Rosa.
She's my girlfriend.
She can fix this.
Rosa: Not your girlfriend.
Blake told me the situation.
We would have to re-create all the files by calling every
patient and getting their medical history.
It's impossible.
Glenn: Oh, I failed.
Blake: Impossible? [ Laughs ]
Nothing's impossible if you follow your heart.
Not even love.
Cat: Hi.
I'm calling from Childrens hospital.
I was wondering, were you ever a patient here?
Beth: And when was his last vaccination?
Blake: What do you think your weight was in 1975?
Lola: I'm still at work.
We have to re-create these stupid patient files we burned
in a hallway campfire.
Owen: She's so ugly that monkeys take her out of their
butts and throw her at people at the zoo.
Cat: And that's it.
We did it!
Lola: Ohh!
Cat: We did it!
Glenn: That's it?!
We replaced all the files?
Cat: No, just this one single file, but you act like it's not that impressive.
Sy: Glenn!
What the hell happened here?!
Cat: Sy, it's fault-- Glenn: No, Cat.
Cat: Oh.
Glenn: I got to own this.
Yeah, we burned the files.
And we'd do it again, 'cause, news flash, Sy -- I don't want
to run your hospital, 'cause as a surgeon, I make sick
money, and you live in a condo at the Harborlight Mall.
Sy: I admit it. I was wr-- I was wr-- I was wro--
Glenn: Sy's having a stroke!
Everybody come quick!
Chet: I got it! I got it!
Lola: No! No! No!
Blake: Thank you, Rosa.
You've been great.
Rosa: I did literally nothing and nothing got fixed.
Blake: Eh, tomayto, tomahto.
Sy: No, I just had trouble saying I was wrong.
It's a tic.
Eh, it's a living.
Sal: Attention, staff.
When I say "That is,"
you say "All."
That is... that is all.
Sync & corrections by honeybunny www.addic7ed.com